Gifting Our Kids With Experiences Instead of Material Things.

Growing up I didn't have many Christmases which is probably why I spoiled my kids with gifts when they were toddlers but now that they are all older gifts are becoming less and less. I have reminded my kids that although the things of the world are nice and all, happiness with those things won't last forever, and the memory of them will eventually fade. I love the fact that we live in an area where we are surrounded by endless culture and history which is why I love going to the city and venturing out to various places in the east. The kids seem to remember moments spent together as opposed to what they got for Christmas last year, two years ago, or even five years ago.

my thoughts on giving at christmas.

As I was watching the kids decorating our first real tree I couldn't help but to picture past Christmases when they were all toddlers. I was figuring out the needs, and wants that would benefit them in their life. Not that my kids are spoiled, but I know that all small children get excited for Christmas (even teenagers.) Heck I'm an adult, and I get excited for Christmas. Simply because of their example. My kids have taught me to remember what this season is about. Love, and family fun. I grew up with very few Christmases, and not with so much "family time". As my girls have gotten older I have learned that Christmas is not about the gifts, but the Savior. Especially Sierra, and Lexie who have been telling me that they don't need anything, and to focus on Chelsea & Noah. I always feel bad when they tell me that because I know that they LOVE Christmas, and that opening presents is fun. They have always sacrificed their needs, and wishful wants so that their younger sibs don't go without. Still...I don't want them to be deprived of the Christmas spirit when it comes to gifts. No one should be exempt. Whether it's a simple Christmas card sent in the mail, or a homemade gift. No one should be deprived of gifts. 

A hug, a smile, a kind word, acknowledgment, forgiveness, calling up a loved one, and giving a compliment to someone are the most simplest gifts that anyone can give. Performing small acts of service such as free babysitting, teaching someone to read, or helping our little old neighbor Janet hang her garland outside her house can be a good enough gift to anyone. 

I'm grateful to be raising my kids in a home that focuses on Christ. Knowing that Christmas is all about the Savior will help them realize that they don't need a bunch of "stuff". Spending time as a family by watching movies, playing outdoors, venturing out to places where it's family oriented, eating dinner together, going on drive bys to drop off simple gifts, thinking of others by teaching them to donate their outgrown clothes instead of selling them for money, giving food to the needy, going by the homeless shelter to donate simple items (blankets, socks) without judging them. You know...stuff like that. Those are the gifts that will keep a family in harmony & unified as one. 

I personally enjoy the gifts...not the material ones, but the physical ones. Such as seeing my kids getting along, and decorating the tree without any shenanigans. A hug from my fellow sisters at church, or just a simple smile. I love seeing my kids on Christmas morning with excitement knowing that there will be a few gifts under the tree. I know how it feels to have woken up to nothing. A sour Christmas. I grew up with so many of them, and each year became numb. That magic dissipated for a few years and later returned while in my teens. Now...that magic has been redeemed more than ever by my four children. The magic I once had at the age of six is here to stay for me, & I don't ever want that magic that I see in my children's eyes (no matter how old they get) become interrupted by deprivation, and sadness on Christmas morning. 

As long as we don't burn ourselves out stressing over who to get what, and fighting over parking spaces, and cash registers cursing at the next customer saying "I was here first", or procrastinating our Christmas until the last minute we can enjoy the spirt of giving during this season. Whether it's a gift of the world, a kind word, a book of mormon, or a gift made with love we can all remember the reason for the season.

"Christmas is not for counting the things that you don't have, but for counting the blessings you still have."

"i love you mommy"

December is a very special month for us because we have three special occasions that we celebrate within two weeks of each other. 

Our wedding anniversary, my husband's birthday, and CHRISTmas. One thing that these special days have in common is the word "LOVE."

Words can mean so much coming from a three year old. It is at this age where their annunciation is much clearer, and more meaningful to the point where they actually might understand what the words mean. 

For the past few days Noah has been uttering four words-"I love you mommy" in a very clear sentence. It melts my heart every time I hear him say that. It's so clear, and when he says it with that beautiful smile of his it brings me to tears. My first boy whom I love so much. It makes me truly grateful to have you in our life. 

I can see why my mom loves my relationship with him, and why she constantly reminds me to never take him for granted. She didn't have that bond with my brother because she didn't raise him. Nonetheless my mother did her best in those short 18 months of raising my brother before my grandmother took over. 

I am cherishing every moment with him whether it's vegging on the couch while watching a little bit of television, cuddling with him on a cold winters day, or lamenting over his small tantrums in the store when he doesn't get his way. 

His small arms around my neck giving me a peck on the cheek then saying "I love you mommy" makes me so happy. Happy because I'm raising him, and because he is so much like his father...always joyful. 

These two are so goofy, and have some so much fun together. It's nice to now have two young boys tell me that they love me every day (sometimes more than once.)  

It's ironic that Noah has been uttering those four words more frequently since the tragedy in Connecticut happened. I never want to miss a day in not telling any of my family members that I love them, and I don't.

This is the time to reevaluate the small things that our little ones tell us, and to pay attention in all that they do...and I have.

My husband turned 42 yesterday, and he said to me that he wants to do just that. Our kids are growing up, and there is no time to waste. We must treasure, and take advantage of our time together, and just simply LOVE.

"Enjoy the little things in life...for one day you'll look back and realize they were the big things."

~Robert Brault