Why My Kids Don't Own A Smartphone...At Least Not Yet.

Having a smartphone is a great tool to have especially in this digital age, and but there is a reason why I will not buy, not even my tween a smartphone. At least until they are 16, or mature enough to own one. I just don't feel the need at this point in time for them to have one. It can be such a distraction, and as much as I love technology (you can tell because of my overused instagram account, and picture posting) it definitely has its pros and cons.

"look up"...especially when it comes to life & people.

After watching this video I was very disturbed at how true the words of Gary Turk are. Even though I have this little blog & am on various social networks I strive real hard to keep in touch with life. I make an effort to call my friends, & family from afar, and actually give 100% attention to the friends that I see on a weekly basis by taking the time to see them in person. I have been blessed to have a couple of friends fly up to spend time with me from afar & that's all kinds of good! I'm so so happy to have a few good friends nearby to "hang" with, and if I haven't seen you in like five, ten, or even 20 years I promise that when we do see each other again it'll be like I never left! 

One thing I'm most grateful for when it comes to this generation with technology is that it doesn't run my life & I'm teaching our kids the same thing...especially the younger ones.

We've never owned a computer until my oldest daughter started high school, and have always had one in the house because that's all we need. I know most parents have multiple computers or laptops in the house, and feel that they have to get one per kid, but that's just ridiculous. Even if I could afford that I would in no way have more than one. I've never spoiled or encouraged my kids to get on a social network as well. 

When my oldest was 15, and asked if she could get a Facebook specifically for school, and to reconnect with old friends I said that would be okay. I signed up for Facebook way before Sierra did after I had Noah, and didn't see the harm in it. Now that she's in college she's hardly on any social network which makes me feel relieved. She'll share a few photos of her friends, blog every once in a while, tweet every few days, but she's not on it every ten minutes. Days, sometimes a week will go by without seeing a tweet, or post from her. Then again...we actually communicate with each other via FaceTime, and call each other, not text.

Lexie will be a freshman in high school this fall, and has no desire whatsoever to get a Facebook, and that makes me feel more relieved! Chelsea has only used the computer to look up research for reports for school, and doesn't even have her own phone...she's barely nine. She's never really been exposed to severe iPad use except for Noah. I have totally limited iPad use for Noah down to about oh, let's see...zero hours. Unless we are on long road trips they can watch a movie on it, and only after we've grown tired of playing the license plate game, or I spy. I do find myself from time to time giving him my iPhone to play a game while running errands, but then again...that's why we have books in the car. He is so good when I tell him it's time to give me the phone without throwing a tantrum. He's growing up way too quick, and want him to be engaged with life outside more than a piece of aluminum glass. 

I want all of my kids particularly the younger ones to get involved with recreational activities. Not technology. 

I want them to feel the sun on their face as they're running and playing on a sandy beach. I want them to slide down the slide with laughter instead of them saying "I'm tired mommy, can I play with your phone for just a little bit." I want them to know that there is a world out there where you can "look up" and see all of God's beautiful creations. Blue skies, birds, green trees, and most of all...people. I want them to live in the moment, and to "feel". To have feelings for others, and not be like a "robot" when it comes to people. I want them to forget for one minute that smart phones, or iPads even exist. And to enjoy all their surroundings when they are outdoors. 

Yes...I want this for my future posterity as well. I hope that after my kids watch this important message, and read this post that they will see how far we've come in being "antisocial" when it comes to people. It's not good, and although technology is used for many a great things I personally don't see why my kids need an electronic device to entertain them when they have their books, piano, violin, crayons, legos, trains, the playground, friends, and most of all...me (and their dad when he's not working).

Oh...and water ice as a treat for being understanding when it comes to the rules of this whole technology fiasco which makes them the best kids ever! 

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop & look around once in a while...you could miss it." 

~taken from the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Technology is a miracle...especially when you have a daughter away at college.

As each day goes by with three kids keeping me busy, and entertained having Sierra away at college gets easier and easier...with time. I miss her, and there are so many times I wish she was here with us to join in on the fun when we go on road trips, long drives, watching movies together, and our late night talks. I especially miss her playing me some Muse, and Downton Abbey on the piano, but I know that she is where she needs to be. 

I know for a fact that she loves being surrounded by mountains, having fun going to school, shopping with grandma & Aunt Emily, playing with cousins, eating at In and Out Burger (jelly), finally working to learn more responsibility, and without talking too much about her personal life (that's what her personal blog is for)...having a boyfriend. Wait...did I just say the B word? Boyfriend! And I'm okay with it? Wow! Seriously though...I look back on the day she asked her father and I if she could have a relationship with a boy so she could experience how it would feel like to have a boyfriend. Her dad and I were like, "what cliff did you fall off from, and why do you feel you must have a boyfriend?" There is absolutely nothing that states in the For the Strength of Youth handbook that indicates, "Must experience an exclusive relationship with the opposite sex." I don't think so. After learning how kids should start to date at the age of 16, I personally feel that kids under the age of 18 should not have any serious relationships. None. Nada. Why you may ask? Because at the age of 12, 14, 16, & even 18 they are way too young to experience such motions in which they may not be ready to handle. Relationships are tough especially at such a young age. Gosh...I wish I would have known all about the double dating rule at 16, and in not having serious relationships in high school back in my day. It could have saved me a lot of heartache, but I would never take anything back. Anything! Everything that I endured, and learned about boys, partying, and all that other dumb stuff in my teen years has made me the strong woman, and mother I am today. Especially when it comes to raising daughters. 

This is when technology is a miracle, and the social media guard is not needed! haha! We read scriptures as a family via Skype the other day, and have decided to trrrryyyyyy to do that on the days she's not working or not too busy with homework, (or Nicholas). It'll be challenge being that there's a two hour difference between us, but we'll certainly try to keep her included. 

^^^ skyping rules ^^^

^^^ FaceTime is a miracle! ^^^

Skyping with Sierra the other day was bliss, and she's definitely maturing. Kids nowadays need to go through some pretty rough patches in order to learn lessons, and grow both mentally and spiritually. I would never wish any of my kids to experience the hurt, and heartache I went through at a young age, but if the Lord puts anything in their path that is hard in order for them to learn, and grow from...so be it. I know from experience that going through some rough patches helps us to become firm, and strong in our testimony with God, and makes us a better person.

I know that Sierra is in good hands living with her grandparents in Utah, and having met Nicholas (the boyfriend) has really helped her in understanding everything that she has learned since the new year began. I'm telling you...there are certain returned missionaries out there who really are mature, and Nicholas sounds like good people to me. Funny thing though...he told Sierra that he is actually learning a lot from her, and she is three years younger than him! 

I am so grateful that she is in such good hands right now. She has been blessed with great things...being closer to family, a job, attending college, great friends that remembered her since she was eight. She's pretty lucky, and so is everyone who gets to meet her. Like I said before... if you didn't get to know her while she was living in Jersey, or gave her a chance in friendship you missed out.

^^^ photo via Sierra's instagram ^^^

What a gal...I sure am proud of her, and all the choices she has made in order for her to find her place in this world. 

We love and miss you Sierra! xo 

my life lately without the "social media guard"

Okay. So I saw this coke commercial the other day & I  personally think that anyone who doesn't have a smartphone clearly doesn't understand what it feels like to really have a smartphone, and if they do well then they really don't know how to put it to use like I do. I love my family, and the fact that I am a stay at home to one child at the moment (who is my only son) I really put that smartphone to use. Especially when it comes to capturing the moments. Notice that I wrote capturing moments instead of taking pictures. There's a reason why I "capture the moments" of the places we've been, the food we eat (or make), places we eat, the things we do with our kids, sleeping, and the way they eat a particular kind of food. It's called memories, and they are ours.

I mean...just look at my overused Instagram account. 

I personally think that the commercial is somewhat over exaggerated...at least for me. Sure I think there are a lot of us out there particularly the "younger" crowd who are addicted in constantly taking photos of every little thing, but I'm not on my phone the entire time we are out on a date, family outing, or enjoying the comforts in my own home. Besides...I don't have any pets to take pictures of getting out of the box! LOL!

I have will power, & know when enough is enough. I have balance & there are times when I don't even "capture the moments." I'm too busy having fun living in the moment that I don't need a "social media guard" thingy around my neck to get off the phone and notice my surroundings including the people I'm with! 

While I got a good laugh over this video & the fact I am a coke drinker (it has to be the Mexican kind) made it better, and it's all good. And to prove to you that having a smartphone at that moment is an advantage so that you can post it right away for your loved ones to see, I've posted a few of those memories here. I am grateful for that instant gratification when it comes to technology in capturing these moments, and I'm not ashamed to say that I LOVE to take pictures...I mean capture the moments! 

After all...all of this is being written, and photographed for my posterity!

And now the iPhone photos...

Noah & technology on Sundays.

Remember the time when Noah had a hard time going to class? Well, after weeks of constantly telling him "you're going to class next week because when you don't go Jesus is sad, and you need to learn." I also bribed him that if he went to class he can play with my phone afterwards. I know...bad mom. Having him playing minions after church isn't the best way to keep the spirit, but c'mon...he's only four years old. But wait...statitiscs show that between the ages of three and five are the most crucial ages in which a child begins to truly understand what's right and wrong. It can be an intense stage of development in growing and learning. 

And I need to be mindful of that.

There are still times (like last Sunday) where I'll tell him that if he goes to class he can play games on my phone on the way home. I figured that it would be safe to tell him that because you know for three hours he's busy singing, and learning about Jesus that he won't remember what I said after sacrament meeting. 

Not! 

Oh no...as soon as we get in the car, and with a huge grin on his face he asked, "Can i play with your phone for just a little bit?" With that gorgeous face of his I can't resist. But...sometimes I say no, and when I do I'm so relieved that he doesn't throw a tantrum...he'll just pout. 

And then I give in anyway. Dang that technology! 

I really don't want him getting in the habit of playing games though...especially on Sundays. As a family we try to stay focused on having the spirit lingering all day long. It's not that easy though. Sometimes I even have to do laundry because I spent my Saturday hanging out with my teenage daughter who brings her laundry home which doubles it...and we have to wash on Sunday! 

But when it comes to technology the spirit is totally different. I do see a difference when we watch tv on Sunday as opposed to keeping it tech-free. There are some Sundays where we'll watch TV, but it's a church documentary, or a movie directed by a mormon.

But let me rewind a bit. 

I have gotten better at telling Noah that he can no longer play games after church, and it seems as if he's been coming around lately with wanting to go to class on his own (okay...I give him some fruit snacks in the end.) I'm not sure exactly what the problem was, but he seems to get along with his teacher, and the other kids. So hopefully he'll get over this technology bug as soon as learns to read a book, play a sport, and get him into piano lessons. 

This past Sunday he actually fell asleep right before his class started, and one of the sisters brought him to my class. Sierra, and I took turns holding him, and he slept the entire hour! I was so happy that he did! I have never had to hold any of my children during Relief Society, and I was okay with that. 

There's a first time for everything. 

On the way home he didn't ask for my phone, and I was in shock! I think he was so tired from attending a sweet sixteen party the night before. He was such in a daze staring into space the whole way home. He was probably coming down on all that sugar he inhaled, and was in need of some more. Apparently all he drank that night was orange crush, and ate a ton of chocolate (that's what happens when you stay home sick, and let your hubby take the kids to the party. Can we say spoiled!) 

I guess this is what i get for having a technology generation baby. I have to go with the flow, learn as he grows, and with a little bit of sternness...cut him some slack too. 

Let's just hope he'll continue to attend his little class so that he can be prepared to start a whole new class in the new year!  

Without any bribing or technology!  

distance makes the heart grow fonder.

After writing about Jon's job loss I was so overwhelmed with the outpouring love that surrounded us on that day. Some of you called, texted, and commented via Facebook, and Instagram. In spite of all the negativity that the social network can bring its times like this which bonds us together as friends where words of encouragement are exchanged, and that makes me extremely grateful for technology.

Most of you that commented are friends that I have known for over 20 years, and that makes me happy!! Most of you I haven't seen since high school, and that's all kinds of wrong!! I just love that we can all come together through social networking, use it for good, and reconnect after so many years. All in the name of oversharing. Especially on facebook. 

I know that I blog a lot, and I hope that you will never grow weary of my words, pictures, thoughts, or feelings.

Life is too short to not share my life with you, and it'll be very interesting when my younger kids are older so that they can read all these posts, and snicker, roll their eyes up in the air, laugh, or cry and say "oh, brother", and "oh no she didn't!"

Sometimes I forget that strangers read this, and yes it can be scary at times because my blog is global, but I count my blessings for not having any kind of weirdness in my life because of it. I haven't had any "real" negativity from blogging either, and even if I did nothing would stop me from bringing my pen to paper,  fingers to the keyboard to share my stories. I may not have hundreds of followers, but I want you to know that if you do read this little blog that I am so, so grateful.

Talking with my sister last night for hours made my whole day. It's been a few years since I've seen her, and again...that's all kinds of wrong!! I'm so glad we can text, and catch up on facebook, and after weeks of not chatting over the phone call each other up and have all kinds of gossip (the clean kind) to catch up on. 

Friends, and family that we haven't seen in a long, long time really softens the heart, and I continue to grow from all the memories that were build long ago from those relationships, and the ones that are in the making today.

When my my dear friend Rosalie came to visit me last year it was amazing, and it felt as if I had just seen her yesterday. Funny thing...we hadn't seen each other in over 25 years!! My friend Ceyda, and her cute daughter will be coming to visit me over my birthday week next month, and I haven't seen her since I moved from Utah seven years ago!! It'll be so nice to see her!!

My in laws have been visiting more than ever from Utah, and that also puts a smile on my face because it makes the kids happy. I can also tell that Jon really misses his mom and dad because he can talk their ear off.

So...who's going to come visit me next year?? 

Distance truly makes the heart grow fonder, and the lives of those whom we haven't seen for years are touched in many different ways. Really makes me appreciate them, and my life even more.

A dark internet

Imagine a world without free knowledge.

So I tried looking up something on Wikipedia this morning, and all I got was this! A black screen that read:

For over a decade we have spent millions of hours building the largest encyclopedia in human history. Right now, the US Congress is considering legislation that could fatally damage the free and open Internet. for 24 hours, to raise awareness, we are blacking out Wikipedia.

Really? Are y'all serious? 

A friend of mine also mentioned this on her blog, and she is not one bit happy about this. She is a pretty big deal on the internet and I know there are a lot of people that lean to her for support through her words.  Now that I have become more comfortable with the internet it feels weird seeing a black screen. I have to admit that since I've become attached to blogging, and know how convenient, easy, and FREE it is to have the internet...for some it may become the end of the world! Not for me. I would just have to get used to the way things were before we bought our computer, and became majorly exposed to the internet.

If I have to scrapbook more, hand write more letters, spend money on postage, printing photos, and sending them to family, and calling more...then I will. If I have to pull out the nostalgic thick encyclopedia's to look something up from the past then I will. If I have to buy the updated encyclopedia's then I will. It's sad to say this, but it seems as if all those things are becoming a thing of the past. I really don't want it to as I still do that from time to time (I do blog more though!)

I also noticed that more and more people are deleting their Facebook. I personally don't use it as much, and will only share my blog on it, and post pictures of family celebrations. It doesn't help when there are other networks opening up such as mylife.com, Path, and of course I think Twitter will always be around.

Since I've been blogging close to a year now I would definitely want to know who my followers are just in case the internet shut down. I know that there are those that I haven't even met who have let me know through the web that I have inspired them somehow. That would be the only reason why I wouldn't want the internet to be shutdown. It's been nice knowing that there are loyal followers out there, and people constantly visiting my blog. I'd hate to see those who are less fortunate pay to read someone's uplifting words of comfort.

If they did boycott the internet...look out! I know there will be a lot of angry people out there going through major withdrawal.  Let's hope that doesn't happen!

Other than that news, and putting in my own two cents worth of words...I think I can live without the internet. I would have to, but those of you who know me know I will reach out to you somehow, and I will find you!

After all, that's what we were all doing before the internet.

Thoughts & rules of the Internet

My daughter and I stumbled upon this article which was very interesting, and it really got me thinking. Not that I worry about Sierra (since she's the only one with a Facebook account), but I was disturbed by the comments that were left by the cast who are in the Facebook Me Play. Disturbed because of the things that were said by these young teens. Some teens use the internet to escape, and some use it for good.

I was very adamant in having my oldest get a Facebook page. I trusted her to use it wisely, and on her 15th birthday she got one. It seems that the older she gets, she tends to be on it more. She does have control though, and I'm grateful that she doesn't give me any attitude when I tell her to get her paper done, and quickly check your email, and log off. Being a junior in high school, and being active in many activities, Facebook is an easy way to stay in contact with other students.

I personally never wanted a Facebook, and I didn't even know what a blog was until friends of mine told me about their blogs. I had no desire whatsoever to have both. After having many friends hounding me to get a facebook, and because of our nomadic lifestyle with moving and meeting new friends, I ended up creating one after my son was born in November of 2009. It was exciting at first, and a blessing to have reconnected with friends from high school, and old college buddies, but then it got old to me. Ever since I knew what a blog was I started one back in January, and use the net more to blog, and share it on Facebook. Once in a while I'll post pictures, statuses, or links that I hope is inspiring to others. I notice that my generation (if your born before 1971) are not on it that much. I notice that today's generation(if you're born after 1994) are on Facebook nonstop.

We have a life. My kids have a life. My teenage daughter has a life. We have one computer in our home and that's all we need. Guess who's on it more? Me. Not because I hog it up, but because I blog a lot (plus it's in our bedroom.) I love to blog about my family among other things. Although I keep a handwritten journal, I decided to do a blog so I don't have to scrapbook every single picture. Plus it's easier because all my friends and family members who live far away can keep tabs on us with a click of a button. I also decided to blog so that at the end of the year I will convert the blog into a book for each of my children. I think that's harmless.

I am very pleased at how we have discussed the rules of when we first got our computer, and how it is ours to share. Like I said... we have a life and don't revolve around the internet 24/7. I may post everyday, but believe me when I write this. I prepare my thoughts so quick as to what I want to write and sometimes I'll draft a few ideas, revamp, make revisions, and then publish it. It's so true as to certain kids who are on Facebook are constantly changing their profile pic, and posting unnecessary statuses that seem to be personal and at often times embarrassing. I've learned to never post anything on my wall, or the wall of a friend that deems private. Use the inbox please. Not all of us want to hear everyone else's drama.

There is a lot of good that can be done on the internet without sheltering our kids, but we also need to monitor our children as to how long they are on the computer. It can seriously take up a lot of your time, and before you know it three hours have gone by! I know because I caught myself doing that with Pinterest when it was new to me. Not a good thing! Luckily my girls have control as to how long they are on the computer whether it's Facebook, school related, or my six year old playing games in moderation which is hardly ever!

Fortunately I have a husband who got out of his funk playing video games long before the first Xbox came out. Sure he'll play children's games with Noah on his iPhone, but truthfully that's about it. I don't need little Noah exposed to too much technology at such a young age. Although he already knows how to tap the games app on the iPhone. Uh oh!

Bottom line is...it's called control, and it's up to us as parents in teaching our children when enough is enough. I have complete trust in my kids, but I still would like to know what they are researching, surfing, and posting. I care a lot about my children, and cant help that by being a parent. I think it's important to use the internet in moderation, and I count my blessings that we do have control. I'm grateful to have cyber smart kids who know their way around a computer. I have sure learned a lot from them (and my husband.) I'm also extremely grateful that we have a tech free house when it comes to eating dinner as a family, having company over, and when we are spending quality time with our kids.  It's so important to have that family time without worrying about how many messages, and comments are waiting for us on our blog or Facebook. We spend our family time with each other...not with our iPhones.

A creative genius

"Have the course to follow your heart and intuiton. They already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."

~Steve Jobs (1955-2011)

I am blogging about Steve Jobs because in my eyes his brilliance is blog worthy. He was an icon and an answer to the world of technology.  He marketed the best computer and brought it into the homes of millions of people. He simplified our lives by the ingenuity of how he designed these beautiful pieces of technology by just simply touching the screen with the tip of your finger on the iPhone, and making iMac computers user friendly. It's sad to say that this amazing man passed away at only 56.

I was five years old when the Apple computer came out, and was exactly 14 when Macintosh was introduced to the world. To be honest I really didn't pay any attention as to what hand me down computers we got during the first years of our marriage. It wasn't until your dad began working for AT&T in 2004 that we actually owned a cell phone, then an iPod, then an iPhone, and now an iMac. Working for the company has it's perks, and we got a good deal when we bought these beautiful pieces of technology...in cash.

Y'all remember the excitement Dad brought into the house when he first purchased the iPhone in 2007, and how y'all would play with it and look at all the cool things it would do? I certainly do. I personally didn't care for it because I was satisfied with my Motorola razor. Then your dad bought me one for my 36th birthday. I had no choice but to join the 21st century and own an iPhone, and...

I. Love. It! 

Y'all know very well that I will never revert back to a push button cell phone. Ever!

And now all of you girls (except Noah) own one, and know how to use these beautiful pieces of technology better than me, and I am grateful to know that y'all are computer savvy.

Noah is watching the 'The Duck Song' on my I4

Being a sales representative selling Apple products, your dad would constantly be watching Steve online giving his key note address at the developers conference for the announcements of when the new launches of Apple products would be announced. Pretty cool huh? He would get excited when a new Apple product would come out. He would even watch the nostalgic key note addresses Steve gave. "Why?"  I asked. "because it's so cool to look back at how this genius would come up with all these new products", is what your dad would say. I would always have to tell him to turn off the computer already and come to bed!

Over the last few key note addresses we noticed that his energy and demeanor began to fade. That's when they announced he had pancreatic cancer. He endured, and kept on working until he felt he could no longer perform his duties as CEO. He stepped down and in his resignation letter he wrote, "I have always said if there ever came a day when I could no longer meet my duties and expectations as Apple's CEO, I would be the first to let you know. Unfortunately, that day has come." Little did we know he would pass away six weeks after writing that letter.

Just like your grandpa Joe's sudden death was a shock to us...Steve Jobs death was a shock to the world.

Y'all are the future generation of this world, and I want y'all to try your best to take charge of your passions and ambitions in this world. Become someone and do something with your life that you have a love for. Steve Jobs didn't finish college, and yet his successes landed him a billionaire.

Still...finish high school and go all the way to graduate school. The future with technology will keep getting better and bigger. Y'all will know that by always owning an Apple product...just ask your dad.