We all have our bad days in mothering, and overall as a human being. I know I do. There are times when, even though I read the scriptures, do kindly deeds, and serve others the best I can that Satan will somehow intervene like the sneaky serpent that he is, and cause me to behave in such a way that is not pleasing to myself or to the Lord. But it's my choice. I have a choice to fight the negative. I have a choice to not think ill thoughts of people, use bad language, yell, or give an unfriendly look to someone who i know talks about my kids. It's not right. It's not Christlike, and it's so not Christian. Yes, I generally come off as this kind, loving person and for the most part I really am. But I also come with disappointment, and imperfectness. Especially when I see others not doing as much as they should. Remember that I'm human, and as long as I am living on this earth I'm going to be tested with people's "idiot-syncrasies", as well as with my own struggles.
When I see someone struggling, all I want to do is help them. Truth is...we are all struggling inside. I know I am. Believe me I have my struggles. We all do. Whether spiritual, or temporal we as mothers have our daily struggles. Even those who may not have children may have a loved one who has issues, or is struggling themselves.
One thing I know for sure is that my kids keep me strong.
Their examples are innocent, and full of strength that I can't even possibly imagine what Lexie is going through in high school with all that she is surrounded with. Cursing, gossiping, kids practically having sex in the hallway. She sees a lot of unhappiness, and misery among other kids, and although it saddens her at times, it also helps her to be grateful. Being the only Mormon in her grade can be tough, but at the same time strengthening. I remind her that it's only strengthening if we allow it to be. Meaning that we have the opportunity to shine as a light, and if we do what is right the holy ghost will guide us to do so.
As a mother I want her to know how lucky she is to have a Christ-centered life, and no matter how tough things may get in high school with schoolwork, friends, teachers, and activities to know that Heavenly Father is aware of our struggles. I want her to be able to come home with a load off her shoulders, and to enter inside our home knowing that she is safe, and that our home is a haven on earth. A place where she can relieve her burdens, and find solace.
Oh, how I pray that my struggles are ones that I can always bear. And that with those struggles find ways to overcome, and get through them without unnecessary drama. It's so hard, but after listening to Elder Holland's talk last Saturday was a reminder to me that I am doing good as a mother. And then I look back at how I raised Sierra who has come a long way in her spirituality. I look at all the good she has done, and how all the trials she's endured helped her to be who she is today. A future missionary who is waiting for her call, and I'm so proud of her!
|^^^ And oldie from conference, circa, 2013 ^^^|
Have a wonderful weekend everyone!