pre school screening.

Earlier last month Noah had taken a preschool screening test for preschool this fall. This program is half a day which I love, but the only downside to it is that they will only choose 12 kids, and do it by  lottery. He's an "old four year old" who has yet to experience a major schoolroom setting, and if he only turned five before November he could officially start kindergarten. So it would be nice if he gets in, but if he doesn't that's okay because that gives me a another year to have him all to myself. Most moms may want their kid to start preschool at a young age, but not me. See...I really wish I could have one more child, but I seriously don't think that's going to happen. I think my clock has run out of time, and at the age of 42 my satisfaction of being able to create a son has reached an all-time high, but how nice it would be if Noah had a brother. I am grateful for this little guy, and that my days spent with  him continue to be glorious added with a side of small stress, and some sprinkles of sunshine. So if he doesn't get selected I won't mind it one bit. 

^^^ Noah listening with intent as the teacher quizzes him for preschool. ^^^

He is sharp as a whip, and the lady that tested him was kind, but had some sternness in her. You can tell she meant business while testing him because when she'd ask him questions, and he wouldn't answer her right away she'd call his name out again, and then he'd look right at her and answer. She only had to do that once, and he "got the picture." Literally. (No seriously...she was showing him pictures of animals, numbers, colors, parts of the body, etc.) He knew then that she meant business, and that this lady was going to see if he is capable, and "smart enough" to go to school so that he can be able to help other kids who have learning disabilities. That's what I love about this program. The kids that are chosen will help mentor those kids with special needs that are already enrolled in the class. I think Noah would be a perfect candidate because he's so sweet, and polite. I've seen him be kind, and respectful to other kids. His Sunday school teacher always compliments on how well behaved he is in class, and how well he listens. Part of me would love for him to have this experience of attending preschool with special needs kids so that his compassion will enhance, and the other part wants him home with me so that we can continue to make full time memories. We'll see what the lottery decides, and either way is fine with me. I'll find out at the end of June. 

I love being a stay at home mom playing with him, and listening to the darndest things this kid says to me. Especially when his sisters come home. 

This week some of his words have been too funny to hear. Here are some of his euphemisms that he's uttered recently:

"Mommy, you have snakes." Me: "What! Where?" Noah: "The ones on your face." (He meant my pimples.) No, I was not squeezing them so I have no idea where he got that from. 

I found this really cute hat at a thrift store, and when I was about to put it on he said, "mommy you don't need a hat...you already have your hair." Very funny Noah...haha! (reminded me of Steel Magnolias when Julia Roberts told her mom Sally Fields that her hair looked like a football helmet!)

So Chelsea comes home, and loves playing with my hair on the days that I wash it, and is easy to comb. Noah says to her, "Stop playing with mommy's hair...it's not a toy." Gee, I wonder where he gets that tone from.) 

Yep...that's my boy. Each day he says the funniest things, and I kick myself for not jotting the ones I missed so that when he's older I can tell him the things he'd say to us. I'm sure that if he gets into this preschool that he'll be on his best behavior, and that he will learn and use his words wisely without getting into trouble. Boys will be boys.  

Lewis Shining Star Student.

The day she won the Safety Essay contest I received a phone call from the principals secretary letting me know that there was going to be a dinner with the American Legion and was going to be recognized for her accomplishment and be awarded a prize, but we couldn't attend because it fell on the same night as her drama production. After talking to her drama teacher they decided that because of endless hours of rehearsal that the drama production took precedence over the dinner.

a day at the popcorn park zoo.

This past Saturday we spent most of the day at the Popcorn Park zoo. We've been here a few times, and each year I'll say "okay, been there done that" but the price is too good to pass up. At five bucks a person you get to see a variety of animals that have been rescued that are trying to start a new life. Maybe that's why I like coming here with the kids. These animals were saved,and like me I was once saved too! The weather was glorious, and because it's a small zoo there aren't too many animals, but remember...this is a refuge for animals so it's not like the Philly Zoo. There are less crowds, and because it's out in the boonies we have the chance to go for a nice drive.

Peacocks roam around all over the zoo, and their so beautiful. I love it when the male peacock flamboyantly shows off its feathers so they can attract the females. 

Lexie is such a huge helper with Noah. I'd always ask if him if he wanted me to hold him, and he'd always say, "I want Lexie mommy, Lexie." So cute! Gives me a little break from my 42 year old back! 

Horses are the girls favorite. When we lived in North Carolina we lived in an equestrian area and always wanted to get them into horseback riding, but it was either music lessons or riding lessons. I couldn't afford to do both for three girls! It's so nice to have a friend here in Jersey where we can go and ride her horse every summer. 

I wish I could have taken these goslings home, and I love how the mother was so protective of them Every time I zoomed in to get a closer look at them she''d hiss at me. Hey, I don't blame her. She's protecting her babies, and I'd so the same thing. But look at them...they're sooooo so cute. 

It was such beautiful day, and I'm so glad that summer is approaching us. We love the outdoors even when it's hot. We miss Sierra as always, and hope that she'll be out sometime this summer to join in on our adventures just like old times. This was a really happy "mommy" moment for me to spend with my kids the day before Mother's Day.

**You can see the other times we've visited this zoo here, ( Noah looks so little!), and here when we took him all by himself.

A Bittersweet Mother's Day.

Mother's day for some of us can be a tad bittersweet. Only because I don't have a lot of memories of them with my mother, but without turning this into a sob story, I have learned to love mother's day because of how my kids treat me. They help me clean, and give me lots of hugs, kisses, and homemade cards with gifts. The favorite part of my morning on Mother's Day is to have the opportunity to attend sacrament meeting. 

This year we had some pretty good 'Mother's Day" talks. My favorite one was by brother Brandon who mentioned how Mother's Day can be a happy day for some, and a hard time for others. To be honest with you I never really looked at it that way...until now.

When I read this story, and knowing that the parents of this sweet little boy will be celebrating mother's day without him broke my heart. The fact that I have a child close to his age brought me to tears, and I can never imagine what she's feeling right now. His talk brought back so many memories of my mother. Some good, and some sad. As I sat there listening to his words all I was thinking about were the happy moments of my childhood. I honestly don't remember celebrating mother's day as a child or young teen with my mom. Sometimes I wonder if she didn't care for that day because of the things that were happening in our house. Sitting there listening, and taking in his words about his personal life hit home. Jon, and the kids always manage to make me feel extra special on mother's day. I may not have lost a child, but I know how it feels to not have your mother there by your side to celebrate mother's day with you...especially when you're little. 

One good thing that came out of that experience is that I don't dwell on it, and focus on the strength in how far I've come in raising my family, and how they have made the past 19 years of my mother's days for me special. And that's what I pray for the parents of little Ryan. I pray that as time passes by she will have the strength to remember the happy moments that sweet Ryan shared with her for those three short years of his young life. I pray that she will feel a sign from him as each mother's day passes knowing that he is watching over her. I pray that she will be strong, and that in time her heart will heal. I pray that she will know that this mortal life is temporary, but that eternity is forever. And that one day she will be able to raise that little boy in heaven. 

*****

Motherhood is definitely hard, and as I grew up, no matter the situations that occurred in my childhood there were moments when I saw my mom care for me when I was sick, hungry, needed clothes, and longed for affection. Sometimes I feel as if I didn't get enough of the affection part, but you know what...that was okay. I am lucky that I've healed from all the heartache that was put in my path while under her care, but the most important thing for me in my life today is that I love her. I am grateful that she is my mom. For being a mom who did everything the best that she can....even in my darkest years. I would never change anything about my mom then, because everything that I endured throughout my childhood is the cause for who I am today. 

A fun, loving, happy, never giving up, strong, 'always there no matter what' kind of mother that will never leave my children's side no matter how hard life gets. My children are the greatest blessings in my life, and I'm so happy that three of them are still home for me to raise! 

I have learned not to be bitter over the things that happened to me, and to not put the blame on anyone for it. Although it took me many years to heal, and endless hours of counseling I learned that by being bitter, blaming others for the wrong turns of my life, and holding in all that anger was not the answer. I count my blessings for finding that light of happiness when I was 20 years old, and for having the gospel of Jesus Christ in my life. But most of all I am grateful to have found a husband who helped me overcome all those demons, and to teach me what unconditional love is all about. 

Seeing all the beautiful photos of my friends with their mothers, grandmothers, and children on Facebook brought a lot of smiles to my face. I think my finger is a little tender from pressing the like button too much. It is so wonderful to have read the statuses in how they appreciate their mothers through the good, and trying times. It's refreshing to read positive statuses as opposed to the bitter ones. Keep remembering your mothers folks. and always treasure the happiest moments.

Rocky on Broadway, & Jewish food.

I can't believe how quickly May has arrived. Last fall I purchased a ticket for our yearly New York trip to help raise funds for cancer research. Now... if you read my blog, and are my Facebook friend y'all know how much New york has my heart, and how much we go! Reasons for this specific trip and going at this specific time of the year is dear to my heart, and it's all for a good cause. I'm grateful to be a part of this group, and to know that if I can't buzz my entire head like my daughter did recently to help raise funds for pediatric cancer that I can do something else for the cause, and in return have a bit of fun!

This year we saw Rocky on broadway and it was amazing! The actors talked, acted, and looked just like a young Stallone, and Talia Shire. It was uncanny, and the performances were excellent! I especially loved the way they portrayed Rocky running up the steps of the "Museum in Philly." Really interesting, and it was pretty cool. 

I tried to capture a few good shots with my iPhone, but was really into the show. Plus I didn't want usher's saying to me, "no pictures please"  like I did when we saw Ghost two years ago. I did manage to get a few towards the end of the final match.

Like I said...New York city is so beautiful this time of year, and since we had a little time to spare before dinner we decided to walk around Central park, and take in some of the sights. It amazes me that most of the people that were on our party bus only come once a year to New York. Seriously?? C'mon Philly natives go to New York more often. The more you go, the more you'll love it! I honestly can't stay from it, and every time I come I try to take advantage of the sights, and capture New York moments every now and then. Not too many today since we had so little time in between all the walking we did, but oh how I love Central park! 

Dinner was very interesting. We ate at a place in the lower east side called Sammy's and apparently is one of the best jewish restaurants in the city. I'm all for ethnic food, and all but this is one place where I never thought I'd try. It was actually pretty good, but to be honest I think I liked the entertainment better. It made me want to be jewish for a minute because of all the sing a longs we were having. Kind of made me want to get out of my seat, and dance! It was so much fun! I was also busy clogging up my arteries with all the different kinds of foods they were bringing out. All these waiters were  bringing out dish after dish. The worst dish I tried was the chopped liver! Sorry I'm just not a liver kind of gal. The Latkes with applesauce, skirt steak, salmon, and chicken were delicious, and because I loved the sweet bell peppers, and bread...I had to post a pic!

The stuffed cabbage may not look too appealing in this photo, but it tastes really good when it's in front of your face. No, I didn't eat the whole thing. We had about 150 people in our group eating at this restaurant so the food was being passed around table after table. I couldn't believe I had rugelach for dessert, and seltzer in an old school bottle. By the end of the night I was completely stuffed! 

It was an amazing day, and now I'm sore from all the walking I did! Can you imagine how in shape I'd be if we lived here not having a car, and all we did is walk! I would definitely be able to eat at every restaurant in the city without gaining any weight!

Too much fun...too much fun! 

22 years a latter-day saint.

So...this past Saturday (same day as Mormon prom) marked 22 years of becoming a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. So if you thought I was turning 22 because of the sign I'm holding bless your heart...I'm actually 42!

Every spring I look forward to many milestones. This being one of them. I can't believe a whopping 22 years have gone by since joining this wonderful church that teaches me about God & gives me hope in times of despair, strength when I am weak, and love when I hurt. 

As I stood up to bear my testimony in front of our congregation this past Sunday with eyes glaring at me whilst bearing my soul I couldn't help but to feel so much love from my Heavenly Father. It amazes me sometimes the feeling that comes over me after sharing my testimony. I feel at peace, and couldn't thank my Heavenly Father enough for giving me the chance to have started my life over again in hopes to become a better human being.

My testimony is always different each time I bear it. I let the spirit guide in the things I want to share. As I recall in my testimony I mentioned how life without the gospel is hard, and it was extremely hard throughout my youth without it. I know this because I didn't have it for the first 20 years of my life. It has helped me in times of challenges and stress, family, people, and overall "life". It strengthens me in ways that are profound, and I am so grateful to always find the courage to share it with others when the time is right. It's so important to focus on the things that bring us positive moments, and to strive to be a better person no matter how rough this thing called life gets.

There is so much I want to say in a testimony, and so little time. There are even moments where I gather all these thoughts in my head as to what I'm going to say and then when I get up there I end up saying something completely different. It's so nonchalant when you let the spirit guide and I end up enjoying the testimony I just shared more than the thoughts that were in my head. I don't like taking up too much time at the pulpit because I want others to have the opportunity to share their testimony as well.

It's always a great feeling to know that I stood up after sitting down. I remember the first time I stood up to bear it 22 years ago in my small ward in Texas I was nervous as heck, but I did it. I've  come to realize that the more I share it whether it's at church, or in a public setting that it becomes easier. I don't do well with silence, or gaps in between testimonies, and there is no way I can just sit there in silence and miss an opportunity to open my mouth. I love it, and without being an overzealous member that goes up every fast sunday I don't always want to stand up, but sometimes that spirit nudges me. That's when I know I need to get up & bear a simple testimony of how much I appreciate the Lord, and for a prophet in restoring His gospel. 

I know this church is true, and that the Book of Mormon is true.  If these two things weren't true to my heart, and didn't believe so strongly in them I would have given up a long time ago on life, and wouldn't continue to stick to it for this long. No matter how hard the trial, no matter how rough the drama with people, and family in general...my belief in those books are firm, and I pray that it always will be. 

lovely young women of virtue.

When we arrived at Vanessa's place to gather with some of the other young women in our ward before mormon prom to take pictures I began to tear up just a bit. Everyone looked so beautiful, and this was definitely a kodak moment! Six years of living here & I have seen most of these girls blossom since the age of 9...including my own daughter, & now she's 14! When did that happen? Seriously Lexie...stop growing!

For some it was their first Mormon prom & for others it was their final. But look at them...they all look gorgeous!! 

I'm so proud of how far these young women have grown to be who they are. Each of these young women carry a unique personality, and are on a different level of spirituality. They carry themselves together really well, and although they may have had some struggles along their coming of age they have all managed to keep it together by never giving up on the Lord. Knowing that they are all daughters of a kind, accepting, and loving Heavenly Father gives them the peace to know that despite any adversity that comes into their life they are never alone. Luckily these girls have each other, and because they are all so unique in their own way, they each help balance each other out and that's what makes them get along so well. They all know how to love, fellowship, accept, and show kindness to others no matter the circumstance. They are our future young women leaders of the church, and virtuous daughters of God, and I love them all! 

Mandatory photo that had to make it into the blog. My wonderful friend Faith took this photo of Noah photo bombing it...too cute! 

This photo is majorly obligatory for the blog with Chelsea's little squint and all. Chelsea and Melanie have become little buddies. I love both these girls, and Melanie...if you're reading this I want you to know that you have come a long way in showing how much you have matured in the gospel, and how far you have come in life to being an example that other young girls can follow. I pray that you will stick to your values, and never let anyone bring you down. The only thing that matters in your life and in your heart is the love that you feel for others, and the Lord. You are loved by so many! Stay strong, and you will go far in life. 

This goes for all of the young women in our ward, stake, and all over the world. You are all beautiful in God's eyes. Stand firm in what you believe in, and stay true to your standards. Your beliefs are what define you, and strive hard to live by them. Remember the values that y'all were taught that we recite every Sunday. Be yourself every day of your life, and others will see that special light in which they want to have. Be a good example, share the gospel every chance you get, & always listen to the promptings of the holy spirit. Most of all...love! Love, love, love everyone that God puts in your way...even the ones that hurt you. Love & forgiveness is the key to happiness, and that is what the gospel is all about. 

"I truly believe that one Virtuous young woman, led by the spirit, can change the world."

~Elaine S. Dalton

"look up"...especially when it comes to life & people.

After watching this video I was very disturbed at how true the words of Gary Turk are. Even though I have this little blog & am on various social networks I strive real hard to keep in touch with life. I make an effort to call my friends, & family from afar, and actually give 100% attention to the friends that I see on a weekly basis by taking the time to see them in person. I have been blessed to have a couple of friends fly up to spend time with me from afar & that's all kinds of good! I'm so so happy to have a few good friends nearby to "hang" with, and if I haven't seen you in like five, ten, or even 20 years I promise that when we do see each other again it'll be like I never left! 

One thing I'm most grateful for when it comes to this generation with technology is that it doesn't run my life & I'm teaching our kids the same thing...especially the younger ones.

We've never owned a computer until my oldest daughter started high school, and have always had one in the house because that's all we need. I know most parents have multiple computers or laptops in the house, and feel that they have to get one per kid, but that's just ridiculous. Even if I could afford that I would in no way have more than one. I've never spoiled or encouraged my kids to get on a social network as well. 

When my oldest was 15, and asked if she could get a Facebook specifically for school, and to reconnect with old friends I said that would be okay. I signed up for Facebook way before Sierra did after I had Noah, and didn't see the harm in it. Now that she's in college she's hardly on any social network which makes me feel relieved. She'll share a few photos of her friends, blog every once in a while, tweet every few days, but she's not on it every ten minutes. Days, sometimes a week will go by without seeing a tweet, or post from her. Then again...we actually communicate with each other via FaceTime, and call each other, not text.

Lexie will be a freshman in high school this fall, and has no desire whatsoever to get a Facebook, and that makes me feel more relieved! Chelsea has only used the computer to look up research for reports for school, and doesn't even have her own phone...she's barely nine. She's never really been exposed to severe iPad use except for Noah. I have totally limited iPad use for Noah down to about oh, let's see...zero hours. Unless we are on long road trips they can watch a movie on it, and only after we've grown tired of playing the license plate game, or I spy. I do find myself from time to time giving him my iPhone to play a game while running errands, but then again...that's why we have books in the car. He is so good when I tell him it's time to give me the phone without throwing a tantrum. He's growing up way too quick, and want him to be engaged with life outside more than a piece of aluminum glass. 

I want all of my kids particularly the younger ones to get involved with recreational activities. Not technology. 

I want them to feel the sun on their face as they're running and playing on a sandy beach. I want them to slide down the slide with laughter instead of them saying "I'm tired mommy, can I play with your phone for just a little bit." I want them to know that there is a world out there where you can "look up" and see all of God's beautiful creations. Blue skies, birds, green trees, and most of all...people. I want them to live in the moment, and to "feel". To have feelings for others, and not be like a "robot" when it comes to people. I want them to forget for one minute that smart phones, or iPads even exist. And to enjoy all their surroundings when they are outdoors. 

Yes...I want this for my future posterity as well. I hope that after my kids watch this important message, and read this post that they will see how far we've come in being "antisocial" when it comes to people. It's not good, and although technology is used for many a great things I personally don't see why my kids need an electronic device to entertain them when they have their books, piano, violin, crayons, legos, trains, the playground, friends, and most of all...me (and their dad when he's not working).

Oh...and water ice as a treat for being understanding when it comes to the rules of this whole technology fiasco which makes them the best kids ever! 

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop & look around once in a while...you could miss it." 

~taken from the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Church Prom Preview.

It was 10:30p.m. when we arrived home, and the heels of my feet were hurting. I don't think I sat down one time last night while helping the youth and other leaders decorate for our mormon prom which is being held tonight. I didn't even think about how tired I was until I was helping set some of the silverware. I was just so excited to be helping the youth in any way I can with the decorations. 

See...I didn't grow up with anything like this. No church, no youth activity, no clean & happy fun. In the 22 years of being a member for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints I have always served in Relief Society, and have never been a part of working with the young women of the church (except my own kids.) And so far I'm absolutely loving it! 

I began to gather every decoration that the kids needed before heading out to the church. Vintage books, gold coins, vintage compass, seashells, snowflake ornaments, and anything I had in the house that they can possibly use. The excitement was building up as I was putting these things in my bag, and I was ready to go. I kind of felt like a little kid except that my 'inner kid' at this moment was filled with light, and all kinds of happy! 

Jon, and my youngest daughter Chelsea tagged along with me, and they helped clean the kitchen. We washed at least 100 plates for the dinner tonight, and luckily I don't mind doing dishes otherwise I probably would have had Jon do it. After the kitchen was clean we all helped the youth with the decorations. 

We walked into the cultural hall, and the first thing that stood out was this...

A beautiful display of a mini D.C. Temple tht looks like a castle, and in many ways it is. 

I began to organize the stuff from my bag, and as I was looking out at all the tables with the various "disney themed" decorations brought back all kinds of memories. Memories of the time I introduced Sierra, and Lexie to Mulan, Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella, Snow White, and Alice in Wonderland. Those are the nostalgic disney movies. Chelsea was happy to have seen the Frozen, Toy Story, and Tangled themes. It literally got me so pumped as to what we were doing, and I wanted to dive right in and help decorate, but I now that the youth is responsible to do the work on their own. Having a Disney theme is a sweet idea, and I am so glad they chose that.

Basically the entire purpose of why we do mormon proms is uplifting, and brings so much peace to my soul. The secure feeling knowing that our kids are in a safe environment without going to any after parties puts me at ease. I know that they'll have all kinds of fun because our mormon proms play clean music, there is no dirty dancing, or grinding train, and are alcohol, and drug free! Oh...and we have chaperones that are looking out for our youth making sure no one is pulling last minute shenanigans.

Being at the church last night to help serve in preparing for this wonderful event was euphoric, and I am excited for all the youth to attend! Especially Lexie who will be going for the first time. She is excited for this prom, but I honestly think she is more excited to be around her church peeps, and to finally wear the dress that I bought for her this past Valentine's Day. 

Yep...she's almost ready to go. She just needs to do her chores, and clean the bathroom. Kind of like Cinderella.

Hello May!

May welcomed me this morning with the sun shining so bright through my bedroom window that I took that as a sign telling me that this is going to be a great month. There are three important events coming up this month. My 22nd year anniversary of being a member of the LDS church, my eldest daughter's 19th birthday, and of course Mother's Day. Notice I wrote that one last. I love Mother's day, but I always tend to forget myself, and honor other mothers instead! I know...shame on me. 

The rain yesterday brought quite a few ups and downs for the fact that we are down to one vehicle now which means we're having to share a car. That's okay because we've done that many times throughout our marriage. We have one car, now two. One car, now two, etc. We let the other car go because we just couldn't keep it. You know...life happens, and we're okay with that. I'm grateful for Jon having started yet another new job last week because UPS does not know what they're missing. Well...they actually know what they're missing because he's the only one they retained after the holidays, but unfortunately the position was peak season, and only during Christmas. Seasonal bites! That's okay-it was nice having Jon home again to spend the brutal winter with us day after day, and now that the sun is shining he's back to work. Boohoo, and hooray at the same time! 

Mormon prom is this weekend, and I am beginning to feel the busyness of my calling in the stake young women. I love serving with the young women, and getting to know other sisters from different Young Women Presidencies is something that I love. People! I love meeting new people! I can see that the leaders love and care about their youth, and I know I still have a lot to learn, but darn it I am going to do my best to serve my calling like a champ. I'm really excited for these kids to have their Mormon prom. It's a lot of planning and I can see that the youth committee are making huge efforts to get this prom down to perfection. I know they'll do a good job because all the proms in the past have always been spiritually fun, and carefully planned by a faithful youth committee.  

Like I said...it rained cats, dogs, and birds all day long yesterday. The rain doesn't bother me at all. I grew up with more rain and hurricanes than snowstorms so rain is seriously not an issue with me (unless you get caught in a major flood!) On our way home from Chelsea's piano lesson we decided to take a detour and see how much rain was on the roads. Probably not a smart idea, but our area didn't flood as much. She got down, and stood outside taking in all the precipitation she could muster while sucking on a dumdum. I snapped a few photos of her whilst in the car, and the sound of the rain beating on the hood of the car was a nice rhythm.

I'm glad to be living in this part of the world because the colors that the rain brings is absolutely breathtaking. I will always forgive winter and a wet, wet spring because at the end of the day into the next morning we wake up to days looking like this... 

^^^ picture taken by yours truly with no filter. ^^^

And that is beauty!

They don't call it the Garden State for nothing.