Monday, September 19, 2011

On Taking a Loved one In

"We may not have it all together, but together we can have it all."
~Author Unknown
Today is my birthday week and to be honest...I've been a little bit overwhelmed. There have been too many things going on in my life since September 10. Don't get me wrong, I love my life and turning 40 this weekend is a pretty big deal. As a matter of fact it's a great big deal. The fact that my mother is coming to live with us is exciting, and I'm nervous. Nervous because I want to make my mothers living arrangements as comfortable for her as possible. I have a feeling she's not going to be too fond of the winters here, but we'll deal with that when Jersey turns into an icebox. We'll just have to buy her a coat.

The past two weeks have been pretty emotional for me. One with my stepfather passing away, hence my mother living with me, and then attending the groundbreaking ceremony for the Philadelphia temple. A sad event occurred one weekend, and was followed with a joyful one the week after. It surprises me that I still do the things I need to do in order to keep my life, and family in order.

I am trying to do my best in my calling as secretary, and I hope that my Relief Society President knows that.  I am trying to be a good neighbor in my community, and I hope that my neighbors can see that. I am trying not to neglect my friends messages, and I hope that they will understand if I don't respond right away. I am trying to be a good wife and mother, and I hope that my husband and children can understand why they have to sometimes make their own meals. I'm not lazy. It's just that sometimes my husband comes home at 9:30, and because my oldest comes home at 5:00 everyday, I haven't felt like cooking huge meals. I know that my kids are grateful for what we have to eat at home. I'm sure once my mom arrives that'll all change, and great dinners will be served. We enjoy having dinner together as a family, and that is something that is important in our home.

I consider myself a generous, kind, and loving person. My heart is filled with compassion and service. The talk given at church yesterday was on service, and how we should be prepared on giving it. Listening to Brother Bergin's talk gave me more confidence that things will be okay. I felt that my prayer was answered. I feel more prepared now in taking my mother in than I was two years ago. My step father wasn't doing well then and she had mentioned wanting to live with us. It broke my heart to tell  her I couldn't do it. I was pregnant with Noah and times were tight. She offered to pay us rent, but I didn't want to take her money. Luckily Joe pulled through then, and he gave my mother another year of his life to spend with him.

I do feel more prepared now to take my mother in than I did two years ago. I'm not going to put any of my loved ones out on the streets no matter how hard their situation is. We are family, and isn't' that what the gospel of Jesus Christ is all about? Helping and serving others without feeling the need to be compensated? Some of us give tough love...I don't. You can have tough love, but make sure it comes with tact.

I don't expect anything from my mother. I know she'll help out the kids with the necessities they need and that will be so helpful, and a huge blessing! Especially when you have three girls. They all love playing piano and only one plays the violin & piano. They all want to continue with their lessons. Sometimes my husband and I have made sacrifices in order for that to happen. I know that they will all go further in their musical talent. Luckily I have a great mother-in-law who helps pay for one of their lessons.

Overall, I feel very blessed to feel so much love for my mother, and for others. I'm grateful that compassion, and unconditional love is not my weakness. Sometimes we forget what life is all about and get too caught up with the mundane. We may not have all the fancy things this world has to offer, but what's most important is family, and that is something that I want to take with me to the eternities.

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